Rune-Kon

So, hey there people. I really don't update this journal thing very much, but I'm here now to complain about the fact that I don't have a scanner and that i really need to start drawing on paper that would fit on a scanner so i could actually upload it onto DA. I have so many works that just sit around my room or hang on my wall that not many people really get to see. gah! Lately, however, i've been Minecrafting every chance that i get cause i am completely addicted. i found this MASSIVE underground cavern that is now becoming my mansion. XD

i don't want to seem like im whining or complaining but i need to vent and DA seems like the best place. Why can break ups never be painless? Why does someone always have to get hurt? the transition from being boyfriend/girlfriend to just friends is so hard. when you finally hang out with them after you break up you want to lean on them and hug them but you can't do that. that pain is so hard to bear. i did that today. i was at the park and more than once i had to walk away because i couldn't handle it and i started to tear up.

which brings me to another point. If an old boyfriend (namely my first boyfriend) and yourself becomes friends again should it be so easy to be really good friends again when you spent the last year hating him? he can read me like a book and when i walked away today he came and talked to me and actually made me feel better. i don't get it.

well thank you for reading if you did though i don't expect anyone too.

So, i really don't update this often enough. i just recently took the ACT (which was surprisingly easy) and the PSAE (which was a joke)...I fell asleep during two out of the three tests for the PSAE and still had enough time to answer all the questions. Ok, so now onto other stuff. There someone i really like, head over heals almost. i can't get him out of my head and it scares me. I think i need a distraction (even though that's not hard) but its proving to be difficult. I need my heart to realize that it will never work out though my brain has accepted this by heart hasn't. Gah, i don't know...i feel like an idiot.

Anyway, i've been on this writing tangent for the past week. My creative writing muse is speaking to me but i don't know what my muse is, ha ha. I've been going through some old stories of mine and editing them. Even rewriting some of them.

Unfortunately, i have no ideas for a picture and I'm supposed to be illustrating a children's book soon. Anyone know a way to get drawing ideas?

i just found out that the "boyfriend" is in Iowa. he didn't tell me i looked at his facebook profile and saw his status updates saying he was in iowa. WTF? he couldn't call? he couldn't leave a message on my wall. No, not at all. and it doesn't help that he hasn't called once this summer. it makes me wonder why i even said yes in the first place. i thought the first boyfriend a person has is really great and stuff but so far the relationship has sucked big time. and what sucks even more is that i really like him so that just makes everything so much worse. Umi, i really wish you were here. you can make everything seem alright again. all i want to do right now is hurt something and i'm not a violent person. in fact it's very difficult to piss me off to this point but.... i don't know whether i want to kill him, scream, hurt something, cry or what. i need a hug or something

i can't believe it's been 11 months since i last put a journal up....well, i have a question? what do you think is the easiest media to color with? i want to start working on my coloring...so far i like oil pastels they're easy to blend not like colored pencils...also if someone can teach me about making more realistic hair that would be much appreciated....

Well, it's Sasuke b-day. Yay! Sorry i haven't been on much lately but there's been a lot of going on and i haven't had much time to do anything. Lets just say that i've been very upset lately and such stuff. but enough sad stuff this is Sasuke's b-day it's supposed to be happy. And i have a question: WHY HAVEN'T ANY OF MY FRIENDS BEEN ON LATELY?!